I’m sinking, my thoughts pulling me under
Thanks for the new improved chemical imbalance drugs
(said sarcastically, with shiny enthusiasm and positive energy!!)
I’m like an iceberg now
Big ass, small torso, tiny dino brain
What was wrong with me that made sedation necessary?
Oh right, I was traumatized by my life.
These pills make me feel raw
I don’t want more rawness
I’m tired but I can’t sleep
Itching like things are crawing on me
MAKE IT STOP!
You want me to feel like it is worthwhile
you have damned me to a spinning hell
Get me off of this thing.
My hair is falling out
I’m becoming what they want to treat.
Treatment helps if you know the patient well enough to properly diagnose something.
I don’t have paranoia. I have anxiety.
I have more anxiety than I can shake a stick at.
“Shake, shake, shake senora shake it all the time.”
Harry Bellafonte is, “Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’…”
My non sequitors flow at high speed early in the morning
The noise sensitivity is unique
My recall is spasmodic
Thoughts of throwing things are more prevalent
My life is CRAZY.
Here’s the short list:
Baby’s high lead levels, epilepsy- “seizure disorder”
small house- big wasps
no art studio
the prospect of moving-within six months
bureaucracy- too many agencies want to help me, causing more stress
boy friend man
Have you tried having an intelligent conversation with a combative 12 year old or 14 year old or 17 year old?
fear of loss, more real loss
terror of losing my daughter
I feel useless, worthless, old until someone, even a stranger, is kind to me.
Learn to be kind to yourself.
Sure, and the magic wand is out of fairy dust.