Disclaimer: Feel free to skip this post. I’m full on venting/ venom spewing but it has been edited as usual. I’m supposed to create some type of teflon shell, that my ex’s behavior is supposed to slide off of. Well, where the hell do I buy it? What kind of body dip, doesn’t just suffocate the body and mind. Leaving me trapped inside screaming bloody murder every time he opens his mouth with some outrageously stupid example of lack of parenting.
Oh, I know, I’m supposed to grow it over time as the distance makes the heart grow fonder, right.
Now I have to go find out how many thousands of dollars my car is going to cost to keep it running.
I included the word dear, because
this letter will never get to you.
I have no feelings of fondness for
you therefore I usually address you,
simply as, __________, your given name.
Thank you for sending my child
to my house this weekend without
his new medication and winter coat.
Actually, thanks for the heads up
that his medication has changed.
This weekend was special.
His behavior was oppositional and
defiant, just as you intended.
It ended with a bang as usual.
He was escorted home by someone else.
Perhaps you can only see that your actions are funny,
like a practical joke played on a blind person.
I think your actions are in bad taste.
It must be fun to think about the ways
you can make my life without you miserable.
Believe me, life with you was miserable enough
why would I want you in it now?
I really am counting down the years until
I don’t have to force you to discuss the boys with me.
It is my legal right to know what is going on with them.
You call asking for help when you can’t figure something out.
I call when I am legally required to, not because I miss you.
This weekend, I called to inform you of the status of your children.
You have a sick child. You sent me an email in response.
I don’t look at my emails when I have the boys
I rely on that archaic device called a telephone.
Wow! Your concern was just not obvious at all.
You’re supposed to know when it happens.
It’s called c o m m u n i c a t i o n.
I know you won’t tell me if the boys are sick,
until the day of my visitation.
I find out from the automated absence greeting
from the school’s computer system.
The public school’s computer system has
better follow through than you do.
I only speak to you about the children.
when I have to
I don’t want to know how you are doing
you’re not a friend of mine.
I don’t care about your new girlfriend
there never was any jealousy before
why would there be any now.
Perhaps you can’t quite grasp
the subtlety in my language.
Now is the time to be less subtle,
If I didn’t have children with you
I would call the police and have
my stalker (you) arrested.
You are too interested in my life
that no longer includes you.
You are a bad human being.
I care about how your behavior affects our children.
Obviously my eldest thinks you’re an idiot,
“he called me a ________-___________, ___________,”you told me angrily.
Well, you are.
I was so proud of myself
for not laughing in your face
as you had when I told you
the things my child called me.
He repeats what he hears at home.
You have become transparent enough
for the two eldest teens to see through your behavior.
You have cultivated an atmosphere of
misogyny, competition and conflict
where there should have been
love, respect and compassion.
My eldest hates himself
My child is becoming a hustler
My tall child has contempt for you,
but wants to live with you
like a gawker at an accident. I’m not sure why.
He’s the one that scares me the most.
Thanking the state of ________
for finally granting our divorce,