Author’s note: It is fall cleaning time again and I found this sitting on my desktop and decided it needed to be completed or filed away for a later date.

These days I wake up
with my heart pounding.
Prednisone,
Tylenol with codeine #3,
Viibryd,
Klonapin (Clonazepam)
Adderall (Amphetamine Salts)
and I keep seeing things
in the corner of my eyes.
Slinking out of the way.
Perhaps my arachniphobia
is working overtime,
or I’m having a reaction
to the prednisone
and my eyes have
actually seen the light.

Whatever the case,
I never see them
directly, so I must assume
the best case scenario:

Tiny eight legged aliens
have taken over my house.
They are very shy and
decidedly non aggressive
TELA must be preserved
until I can prove their existence,
therefore I will never vacuum again.

It would be seen
as an act of violence
toward the TELA visitors,
who are trying
desperately to make contact.
I am a sometimes kind
creature and cannot abide the
necessity of mass extinction of a
yet undiscovered race of TELA
for the sake of an obsessive,
yet necessary loud,
walking motion with a
weapon of mass cleaning
in my house.

I am reluctant to halt this activity, but
I can see no other way to attempt
communication with TELA.
They could have besieged
my body as I slept,
without even realizing
the terrain they crawled upon
was an actual life form.

Yes, I hear you scoffing.
“She just doesn’t like vacuuming”
What’s not to like?
I walk in a dancing motion
forward backward repetitively
with a rolling vibrating machine
whose roar is so disturbing
that my children
used to scream
in pitch with it.

You naysayers may mock me
but have you ever heard
three children
screaming in unison
over the tone of the vacuum
for the entire duration of
removing dust particles
that can never completely
be removed.

Yes, the heavy metal vacuuming experience
is on hiatus until
I make first contact with TELA
and buy adequate ear protection
for my children with dog hearing.
Another gift from my gene pool.

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4 thoughts on “These Days

    1. I got it 🙂 took me a while too, but no, I don’t have a heavy metal Kirby vacuum cleaner, Mine’s a Hoover and made of plastic. I meant heavy metal music. Now, I’m going to have to listen to Metallica. Thanks Calsen!

      Liked by 1 person

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