Math

After an unpleasant
parent pick up from a
not too pleasant ex
and new girlfriend
due to My Child being
put in the middle
and acting like a brat
in the parking lot. I
would like to ask you
for help. Math help.

Cross your fingers and
lets do some algebra
together. Not really algebra
just adding and subtracting
large numbers while using a
formula that should help us all
out. Ready for the story problems?

Is anybody still reading this?

Anyone screaming in terror, just
put some Shostakovich on and cover
your eyes
listen to the music and pretend you are
trapped in a shopping mall Monday
morning at nine am just as it opens
breathe deeply to the rhythm.

Let’s just say that
Child B is
15 years 8 months old.
That makes him 4745 days+ 7 months old
12 months minus 7 months equals 5 months
30 days *7 months equals approximately 210 days
5475+210 days old?
which equals 5685

Child C is
13 years 8 months old.
That makes him 4745 days+ 8 months old
12 months minus 8 months equals 4 months
30 days *8 months equals approximately 240 days
5475+240 days old?
which equals 4985

As each child reaches 17,
they will be
6,205 days old

How many days will it be until child B reaches 17 years old?
6205-5685=520 days.
How many days will it be until child C reaches 17 years old?
6205-4985=1220 days.

after 1740 days
I will no longer
have to negotiate
whether or not it
is okay for my
children to play
dangerous sports
or have dangerous
toys in a household
I no longer reside in.

I ask myself if one of
my policemen friends
would have shot my
child had he been
enraged when they
arrived to arrest
him if he had his
katana in his hands
and looked aggressive.
I’m not complaining
about the police here.
I complaining about
the idiot who bought
a child with an anger
problem a sword while
he was blowing up and
getting aggressive with
me. The timing was priceless.

Sure, give the boy what
he wants whether he is
mature enough or not.

Sure, let the boys play
aggressive first person
shooter video games after
said child was released
from the detention home
with strict instructions
from the magistrate
prohibiting him from
playing with any violent
toys or video games.

Can I hold my breath
for 1740 days
or should I just try
to tread water until
I get exhausted and sink.

My body mass index of 18
should keep me afloat
for about five minutes.