I used to have a written
or verbal response to everything
then I retreated from people
and writing because no one wants to
read about or talk to
a depressed person experiencing
the same crazy stuff year after year
It’s depressing

Oops! The only way to handle
stress is to have some healthy
way to express life’s frequent downs
(Yeah, I know. Everyone else calls it
ups and downs. I don’t.)

Now, my response is palpable
My heart is not happy
That little beat that skips
when falling in love
also can skip when stressed too
PAC’s or PVC’s
no, it has nothing to do with plumbing
until you start making puns
ha ha ha

Premature ventricular contractions (PVCs)
premature atrial contractions (PACs)
are not dangerous per se but
it’s my body’s way of letting me know
“Whatever you’re doing
IS NOT WORKING-
try again!”

It is disconcerting to
feel my heartbeats pounding
in my chest
in my ears then
to hear feel it
FLUTTER
which means it
skipped a beat

Less concerting than:
peptic ulcer
fainting spells
(psychogenic epileptic seizures)
ocular migraines
insomnia
dyshidrotic eczema
boils

Please have a field day
viewing these anxiety inducing
links above

All of these conditions can be
managed by
lots and lots of therapy
creating a diverse support network
some form of exercise

(Seriously, get out of bed
in your dark room and
go into the daylight,
you shouldn’t burst into flames
unless you are truly undead,
in which case,
try again with a white hoodie and
highly reflective umbrella
No, I’m not making fun of
real people with porphyria)

a healthier diet
reduction of stress and
finally, more sleep

thinking about getting more sleep and
actually sleeping are two different animals

Ha ha ha ha haaaaaa!

Completely off topic flower photos:

IMG_6152
Azalea
IMG_6059
Shrooms
IMG_6149
Iris
IMG_6053
Lilac
IMG_6046
?
IMG_6039
First Trillium sighting!

 

2 thoughts on “Skip to the images at the bottom

  1. You are writing for you to hell with these people who don’t have a clue….I stopped wanting or needing from people who just don’t understand or at least honest enough to say..they are in as much pain as you are….its very easy to point the finger its much harder to stand by there words

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are right. My anxiety decreases when I don’t obsess and overthink things. It is so hard to just let go and be a good human who makes stuff. Gardening helps, listening to artists helps, reducing my exposure to toxic people seems to be working wonders for my self esteem.

      Looking back at old portfolios, I realized, I was good at drawing and painting. I just started listening to the idiots and self doubt agreed with them and it was downhill from there.

      Like

Any thoughts on the above post are appreciated! Otherwise, I think I must be living under a rock.

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