Been trying to get up since 7.
The little girl abandoned me for cartoons and I was left
Finally alone, tears poured down my face.
I thought about calling someone texting someone to tell them I feel wasted, used up and discarded like an old tissue.
No one wants to receive that call:
“Hi. I’m calling from the abyss. Do you have a ladder or rope? I don’t remember falling in here, but here I am. Stuck, not quite floating, definitely flailing.”
Oh my god how I dread children’s birthday parties at party places filled with screaming children, shrieking siblings and the roar of parents voices trying to drown it all out.
Should I take a sedative when I arrive, so I don’t ruin someone’s special day with a panic attack. I can’t remember what I’m supposed to do to counteract sobbing. Vitamin B12?
I avoid crowded places like Chuck E Cheeze, Cedar Point, Walmart, concerts and festivals because they trigger my, “Oh sh&t, I want to run and hide,” overstimulated sensory response. But I can’t cancel going to Girlie’s cousin’s birthday party two years in a row. Or can I?