She died

I had a friend almost exactly ten years my senior the sister I never had a running buddy to laugh with travel with while cleaning detritus. Hours of laughing the Aman and Stacey show provided comedy and food at a sculptors conference. We eat, gather and hammer each year The last time we were there…

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I started writing…

Last week I had the best intentions to wake, bathe, write, eat, wander I can't remember where I was when life interrupted. There was a death. Again. My eldest uncle died. He was 6'8" tall, in his 80's A lifetime of alcohol, music, art and heartache. He was tired. Refusing treatment for a hernia and…

An Online Family: Loss

I never know what to say I have feelings of a dread when I should feel relief for her No more pain I am selfish to want another conversation another look into her life her perspective, her struggle with mental illness devastating depression There is so much unsaid I'm a day late for her online…

I crashed this week

Thought hospitalization would help fix something, anything. I never got there. I called for help, but this is the time of year when everyone has parents in hospice or recently died or are terminally ill. I am not that sick, therefore I am not a priority. Suck it up sweetheart and try to put one…

My empty hand

I show my empty hand then I play my cards like the M emblazoned in the pigment of my palms I can be no more no less than what I am Mother, Metalsmith, Mystery, Me I show my breaking heart then march ahead into the fray like the Matriarch of plants and children I nurture…