Exhausted

I write with one arm underneath the keyboard, too lazy to get a hot water bottle for my sore wrist. The heat penetrates to the aching bones it feels good to rest without a toddler a teen toddler and a brooding young man. Life being what it is becomes a hassle not worth discussing. I…

March 2017

I wanted to post an update, but just don't have the energy to write and write, so here are some photos. It was warm and sunny until a couple days ago. I even dug a little garden in the back yard. Then it snowed and the will to stay awake was buried under the clouds.…

I’ve been

Holding back the vitriol in hopes of gaining some perspective about the teenage animal My Child. Wild, elusive, inconsistant baffling, frustrating, instigating volatile, persecuted, open then closed Resistant to reality, rebellious struggling to find self losing self when it gets too comfortable self sabotaging, maturing in his immaturity This stage of adolesence would be better…

Leaving

Leave Me by Gayle Forman came in the mail two days ago. I just got a chance this evening to read it. This is not a review of her book, but a thought that poured forth after I closed the book. This novel arrived during the week I contemplated running away from home. Not the…

This Angry Child

Doesn't care about his court appearance this morning Refuses to worry that he could be taken from my home Tells me that I'm the only one who cares about it Really? What parent wouldn't care about the hand of law taking their child? Oh yeah, his father doesn't care My children have been taken from…

I’m supposed to pick my battles

I'm supposed to breathe deep and not yell back at My Child, a screaming oppositional defiant, six foot three inch teenage boy who cannot will not complete his homework or show proof that he has completed the work he submitted. I fear that he has been submitting empty documents just to get his phone back…

Sensory Processing Issues

I'm having fun with Girly who is a sensory kid. She loses her mind in the bathtub. (Hysterical screaming and will injure herself to get out of the water) Brushing her hair was a scream fest as well. I just shaved her hair down to 1/4" of cute curls that we still can't brush without…

No time

Briefly, panicking again I don't have time for this boys have to be awake Girl needs a new diaper and clean clothes, plus food Have to go to court again for My Child, I'm worried I have to go. I have to take a shower and put on a dress with tennis shoes bright lime…

It is Fitting

I blinked, the clock told me I was ten minutes early I did a double take just to make sure Usually, the clocks are wrong or, I am ten minutes late I had just enough time to pay a bill over the phone I had been procrastinating about this call for ever No time like…