This dark cloud has me bedridden stomach burning in response to my foul mood. Triggers land like landmines in my head in my house, in my life. Betrayed by someone with an agenda. My lifestyle is offensive. I have upset the mowing community by mowing without gas. These events cause undue harm to my fragile…
Mother, may I?
He said he suspects that my seizures are a physical manifestation of my downward spiral into mental illness. Since they seem to correspond to stressful situations. Unlike the most recent hospital, he was not saying that I faked my seizures, but my body has taken control of my mental state by crippling me, making it…
Book Reviews
I have been reading during my hibernation this winter. This is the first chance I've had to hunker down and lose myself in new worlds since I'm up at the pre-crack of dawn (2-4am) every blessed day. I could be up doing laundry or cleaning my bedroom, but as I have said before this is…
TMI Feminine Products
So, I'm trying to remain calm instead of the primal being I have become... This is your last chance to stop reading before I launch off on a tangent about my feminine issues. Remember you have been warned. ..while I am having hormone adjustments (the life force is draining out of me as we speak)…
EEG Update -after the neurologist
I had the neurologist in stitches. He laughed out loud at the ridiculous things they said to me. I love this neurologist, soft spoken but blunt. A nurse walked me in to the small office to get my vitals before he came in. I've gained some weight. I'm back up to a reasonable skinny weight,…
So it takes how much abuse to develop self esteem?
I've been independent for how many years lurking in the shadows avoiding blows and running to be safe and feel secure looking for someone to hold my hand feeling like crap with the self esteem of a slug (who knows, they may be the self esteem powerhouses that glide on their own slime. Actually, lets…
Wait a Minute – EEG Update
I received the call I was waiting for from the Neurology Department. It should have been what I expected. She said, the hospital has had "problems in the past" placing the leads in specific places on a patient with dreadlocks therefore I was asked to completely untwist my entire head of hair to be measured…
Wait a minute
"Patients with dreadlocks can't have EEG's" said central scheduling. WTF Try again without seeing my head. I just took pictures of the top of my head and sent it via text to the poor neurology dept. secretary who got a not too friendly transferred call from me. "I'm not shaving my head for an EEG."…
Obviously, I don’t get it.
He puts his head down as I talk He never responds when I ask questions Obviously, my questions hurt him His soul is a one celled organism Speaking to no one hearing only attack, slight, and complaints. I want to know because I don't understand. I do not want or intend to hurt him. Getting…
The Falling Season
I'm not a clutz but I look like one recently I have been falling a lot. My culprit is my back spasms that come out of nowhere they are triggered by movement strain, walking, sitting while sleeping or waking. My favorite spasms are the screaming spasms that remind me of my brother's charlie horses when…
Amanuensis Sobriquet-Reverie 