There really is no one there the hours pass and I hear birds cars and trucks on the road no one speaks to me my face scrunches ready to cry. my tear ducts refuse to cooperate. Another dry day of dread and solitude. This from a woman who likes to garden alone should be able…
Clean the yard/Save the Greenhouse (It’s White)
I wrote this Sunday edited it Monday between naps. Yesterday was a forced march clean up the yard afternoon that I imposed on my men/boys How long does it take to complete a chore really? Two piles of leaves have been sitting in my driveway for over a month and I want them gone today.…
Obviously, I don’t get it.
He puts his head down as I talk He never responds when I ask questions Obviously, my questions hurt him His soul is a one celled organism Speaking to no one hearing only attack, slight, and complaints. I want to know because I don't understand. I do not want or intend to hurt him. Getting…
3am, not 4am, not 5am
Placate the gods Really, cause I have nothing better to do. Obviously, I have pissed off the insomnia gods. I should build a temple in my front yard Set it alight and hope the gods notice before the local fire department. Next month, I will try building a mud tower to placate the angry- pain,…
This is what happened at the hospital, last Friday-Tuesday
This is the letter I will be emailing to the Hospital Inpatient Behavioral Health Satisfaction Survey. I am going to go through and remove the Doctor's names, so that you get a sense of the experience without having the real names of anyone involved. Me and my damn ethics. The names also do not correspond…
Stress, chocolate, sugar, caffeine and not enough sunshine.
I forgot that it is all up to me to create order in my chaos I forgot I am addicted to sugar, chocolate and caffeine I forgot the crash is lower and more spectacular after a binge I forgot that people who offer you what you are addicted to are enablers I forgot that just…
24 Partial Sanity list- Long and sad, so get tissues or read it another day
I said I would not post today because it is one of my high anxiety days, but fell asleep last night in Girlie's room watching her breathe, so I'm posting today. I'm sorry. I startled awake on my left side at 2 am face down on my hand in front of my computer a car…
Golden Hug
I wrote this for you and hope it gives you some that you lost. I have a golden hug for you with a warm center to enfold you and help you heal your heart and soul. I will run barefoot through the dew and think of you as I plant a row of trees today.…
My empty hand
I show my empty hand then I play my cards like the M emblazoned in the pigment of my palms I can be no more no less than what I am Mother, Metalsmith, Mystery, Me I show my breaking heart then march ahead into the fray like the Matriarch of plants and children I nurture…
Daily Affirmation
Daily affirmation: I am strong and I fill my life with positive people. It has been suggested that I do grounding and meditation breathing three to four times a day. Probably 6-8 times to help my current situation. I am in the court ordered process of removing my steel from my ex's studio. When I…
Amanuensis Sobriquet-Reverie 